Interesting fact by Dr. Kevin Leman

Our birth orders in our family consequently impact our attitudes.

This is an interesting article that I read not too long ago that want to share with you readers coz' i found it quite true to me. Enjoy reading. =)

First Born

Positive traits: natural leaders; are competent; display responsible behaviour; comfortable socialising with adults from an early age; high achievers; frequently live with a sense of entitlement and even superiority; strive to protect and help others;tendency towards conformity

Negative traits: demonstrate perfectionist qualities by putting pressure on themselves to succeed; often moody; occasionally lack sensitivity; intimidating, particularly in pushing people too hard or refusing to take no for an answer; known to be authoritarian or bossy

Needs: Authority approval

Suggestion: First born children have to know that it is okay for them to fail sometimes. They need to be aware that it is okay that they are not the best all of the time so long as they have tried their very best and that their significant authority figures (parents/teachers) would still love them

Second Child / Middle Child

Positive traits: independent and competitive with the oldest sibling, especially in small families; tendency to develop their own persona away from the family to
develop abilities not found in the elder siblings; may tend to be a people-pleaser and usually hate confrontations; very calm, down-to-earth; can adapt to changes and acquire very good social skills; great listeners; good mediators and negotiators

Negative traits: may feel uncertain of self and own abilities if the elder child is successful, feel "squeezed" when a younger child is born; seldom getting parents undivided attention, may lean towards rebellions; difficulty in setting boundaries; not good at making decisions that would offend others; tend to blame themselves when others fail

Needs: Sense of belonging

Suggestion: Try to include second born children in all activities. They are likely to be motivated by a cause and enjoy working with people because that would give them a sense of belonging.

Youngest Child

Positive traits: creative, unconventional; charming and adaptable; strong people skills; love to entertain and talk to others; make friends easily; an extrovert; energized by the presence of other people; display the highest developed levels of emotional intelligence; not afraid to take risks; may behave like only child

Negative traits: cannot accept to be “dethroned”, used to always getting their way, tend to get bored quickly; strong fear of rejections; short attention span; self-centred; tend to have unrealistic expectations, expect others to do things, make decisions, and take responsibility;
feeling disadvantaged in being the smallest and weakest, develop feelings of inferiority or become "speeder" to catch up with older siblings

Needs: Need attention for their efforts

Suggestion: Last born children may have babyish qualities, such as excessive tattling, crying, or whining. It is important that you must not get annoyed with these habits but give them some extra tasks to make them feel helpful and allow them to become more mature. They will often do anything to be noticed, so ensure you appreciate their efforts.


Only Child

Positive traits: always the centre of attention, they often enjoy this position as it makes them feel special; can be very matured intellectually; task-oriented; extremely well-organized; highly conscientious; dependable; feels extremely comfortable with responsibility

Negative traits: feel unfairly treated when not getting their own way; may refuse to cooperate; can be selfcentred; tough to handle; may play "divide and conquer" to get own way; missing out on the social skills learned through sibling interaction, may find it difficult to share or
compromise; can be very demanding; hate to admit they are wrong; do not accept criticisms well

Needs: Recognition

Suggestion: It is necessary for the only child to be aware that you know how hard he/she is trying and how hard he/ she is doing. This reassures the child that he/she is living up to your standards and boosts his/her overall confidence.


Interesting? Let me know your feedback =)